20 Weeks Along with Our Baby Girl

Here's our beautiful girl about to suck her thumb

Just about 20 weeks

16 Weeks and Counting...

I'm 16 weeks along showing my little baby bump! Juni does not look ready to have a baby in the house. 

To Good Health

Today I am grateful for something that I used to take for granted: my health. My health is something I have come to appreciate very much over the past 4 years and thank God for everyday.

I started understanding that my health wasn't a guarantee when Ryan began seeing patients as a 3rd year medical student. He would come home from the hospital and tell me about the many ill patients he saw that day, and sometimes about those who had lost their battle.

That same year I met my friend Ann at work. Ann was an incredibly generous and courageous person. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in her 30s, was now in her late forties, and had been fighting the disease for many years. Ann still came to work, took care of her son, and was a friend to me, despite undergoing many different kinds of chemo and radiation. The first time I met Ann, she was in remission, but a few months later, the cancer reared its ugly head again and had metastasized to her liver. We were all crushed, including Ann, but we took our lead from her and kept on going.

Chemo is absolutely terrible, it basically kills you without actually killing you.  That's what Ann dealt with every day, while giving 100% to her work and to her son. We all did our best to keep her spirits up, as well as one another's. We were like Jenga pieces, if we all stayed strong the tower would hold, but if one of us fell the whole tower would come crashing down. I remember the day Ann told me the cancer had spread to her brain. We were standing in the hallway and she said to me, "I'm not ready to die." And me, being very naive said, "don't worry Ann, God won't take you until you are ready." She smiled and said, "I hope you're right," but of course I was wrong.

I saw Ann for the last time on her 50th birthday when a group of us went over to her house to celebrate. All of us had little gifts for her. I gave her a pretty bracelet because jewelry was one of her favorite things. She was very tired and weak, but she was also sitting up and talking so I didn't think she would be leaving us yet. Ryan had tried to prepare me for her death, tried to keep me grounded and realistic, but I was shocked and heartbroken when she died a week later. Ann was the first person I loved who died, at least in my adult life. I struggled through the stages of grief with Ryan by my side.

That year was the first time I truly understood that life is fleeting. Now that Ryan is a neurosurgery resident, that message is reinforced every single day because he sees death every single day.  He tells me his patients' stories every night at dinner, and we are reminded about the fragility of life time and time again.  Although its incredibly sad it reminds us that we are alive, are blessed with good health, and have healthy family and friends, which is yet another thing to be happy about.

Happy Holidays from Woodland Park Zoo

Holidays at the Zoo

Our Baby Makes 3

I am so excited to finally share amazing news - Ryan and I are going to be parents! I'm about 12 weeks along, which means the baby is due right around the 4th of July.  We are thrilled and can't wait to meet our baby!

After 4 1/2 years of marriage, Ryan and I are very ready to expand our family of 2. I will never forget the expression on Ryan's face when he saw the positive test, it was full of so many emotions...it makes me smile just thinking of it. 

We were bursting with the news of our baby and couldn't wait to tell our family the next day. Since we live in Seattle and couldn't tell them in person, we decided to send them all an email with a picture of the positive tests. Then we called them and listened as they checked their email. Their reactions were unforgettable - a lot of screams, gasps, and tears of joy.

God has given us everything we've ever wanted and more, including our most recent, and most wonderful blessing, our baby.

The Penguins!

I'm so lucky to get to work with the penguins at the zoo. Here are a couple videos of my little friends!

Penguins

Penguin Chick Learning to Swim

Our Niece Aiden

Wow, I've been a terrible blogger. The holiday season has officially begun and things have been a little busy! Ryan and I just got back from Texas for Thanksgiving and it was wonderful to see our family that we miss so terribly much. We also got to celebrate our niece's 3rd birthday! Being an aunt to Aiden or Aidy as we call her is one of the greatest roles in my life.

Aidy is the first baby in the family and has quickly become the joy of the family. We all think she is perfect in every way. I was lucky enough to meet Aidy an hour after she was born and I loved her instantly. She was swaddled up, with her little pink hands by her face, and looked exactly like my sister. It was one of the best moments of my life.

 

Aidy is 3 years old now (I can't believe she's 3!) and has grown more and more amazing every time I see her.  She is incredibly sweet, always willing to share her food, toys, or anything she owns with you with the kind words "for Ambie" (her name for me). She's also very thoughtful -  just a few days ago I was trying to open her package of play-do and she said "Ambie, I get scissors, don't hurt hands." A 3-year-old said this! She loves to crawl in my lap and snuggle and has an infectious laugh, smile, and overall happiness that affects us all.  She's very independent and smart, not to mention hilarious, playful, fun, loving, and so much more.  Aidy is a true blessing in our lives.   

Saying goodbye to Aiden is always difficult for me. The first time I said goodbye to her was only a couple days after her birth. I'm not a person who cries easily, but I boo-hoo'ed at the hospital, on the way to the airport, at the airport, and even on the plane. I was the lunatic woman crying alone on the airplane! I still well up when I know a goodbye is near, especially when she says "love", which is her way of saying "I love you."  I know how much of her childhood I'm missing, but thankfully she always remembers me, greets me with a "hi Ambie!" and we pick up right where we left off.